One and Done: Not Such a Horrible Phrase.

A few weeks ago, I saw yet another new hairdresser.

“How many kids do you have?” she asked, as women getting to know other women do.

“Just one,” I answered.

Then came the inevitable question. “Are you going to have more?”

I was quiet for a moment, not sure what I was going to say. And when the answer came, it surprised even me.

“Nah, I don’t think so. I’m getting kind of old to pop out babies. I think maybe we’re in the one and done camp.”

She just nodded and said, “Yeah, me too.”

We spent the rest of the appointment talking about our girls, and how nice it was to be done with baby things, and to be able to get our lives back (at least a little bit).

But the whole time, I was silently evaluating how the phrase “one and done” felt as it ricocheted around my brain. It wasn’t something I had ever said out loud before.

And you know what? It felt okay.

I feel okay.

Would part of me still like to have a newborn to snuggle? Yes.

Do I miss burp cloths and blowouts and teething infants? Not a bit.

I love my husband. Can’t imagine having a child any more awesome than my Tori. And honestly? I kind of like me, too. I’m pretty cool when not exhausted and suffering from postpartum depression.

So, that’s that. The cat’s out of the bag. The decision’s made.

I’m the mom of one fabulously awesome, insanely challenging child. An only child.

And that? Is a pretty awesome thing to be.

 

tori wears a tutu to garden

 

 

9 Comments on One and Done: Not Such a Horrible Phrase.

  1. Meagan
    July 31, 2013 at 11:07 am (3 years ago)

    And 1 is just fine. Chris is an only child. There’s certainly no rule that says you have to have more, that 2 or 3 or even 4 is the perfect number. It’s all about finding the right number for your family.

    We’re done with our 2. Two is the right size family for us. There’s a comfort in knowing you’re done, that this is your family.

    Reply
  2. Lady Jennie
    August 5, 2013 at 10:02 am (2 years ago)

    It felt good to finally feel happy with what I had, but it took about a year after the miscarriage for me to get to that point.

    Tori is gorgeously cute.

    Reply
    • Amber
      September 9, 2013 at 10:29 pm (2 years ago)

      Thank you. I’m a little behind in my commenting, as you can tell, but I’m glad you’re still out there! Hugs!

      Reply
  3. Michelle Villemaire
    August 13, 2013 at 11:15 pm (2 years ago)

    Loved your piece over and Scary Mommy and thought I’d come visit. Congrats on your decision to be done! I just posted on this topic on my blog as well. As an only child myself I can say, IT’S AMAZING!

    Reply
  4. Michelle Villemaire
    August 13, 2013 at 11:16 pm (2 years ago)

    Loved your piece over at Scary Mommy and thought I’d come visit. Congrats on your decision to be done! I just posted on this topic on my blog as well. As an only child myself I can say, IT’S AMAZING!

    Reply
    • Amber
      September 9, 2013 at 10:27 pm (2 years ago)

      Thanks so much for visiting! It’s good to know I’m not alone. I think she’ll do just fine as an only child…she’s certainly not shy!

      Reply
  5. Bridgette
    September 5, 2013 at 1:13 pm (2 years ago)

    Thanks! I totally agree…always nice to see and read there are others out there, hah!

    Reply
    • Amber
      September 9, 2013 at 10:24 pm (2 years ago)

      Mothers of singletons, unite! It’s a tough road, sometimes…people look at me like there’s something wrong with me!

      Reply

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