Sisters of the Heart.

I am not always a good friend. In fact, I am often too self absorbed and too busy to give my friends the attention they need.

Sometimes, I’ll realize months have gone by since I even heard their beloved voices over the phone, never mind hugged them close in person.

I hate that. I hate that my life, or maybe just the way I prioritize my life, gets in the way of these very special friendships. I hate it when I cop out with a quick text rather than spending the hour my friends need to feel heard.

It’s something I’m always working on. And probably why I rely so heavily on my online friendships.

After all, the women inside my computer operate the same way. They’ll dash off a direct message in Twitter when they need to vent, or send an email when they need attention. Their voices exist mostly in my head, with rare meetingsĀ  to give me faces to go with the emotions.

But still, there are those few women I can’t do without. The sisters of my heart. The ones who have known me since I was young, and unsure, and loved me in spite of my jumbled mess of neuroses.

The ones who will still drop everything and come when I need them.

There are fewer of those than there used to be. Some, while still dear, have become almost-strangers. Not just because of my neglect, but also because we’ve just well, grown. In different directions.

That makes me sad.

It’s just life, I guess. But it’s still sad.

That’s why this article on the power of lifelong friendships got to me.

It was sent to me by one of those soul sisters. One of those women who has stuck with me. Who’s been there to wipe my tears through the worst of times, and celebrate with me during the best.

I hope beyond hope that our friendship lasts, well, forever. I want to be 70-something and still know I can call on her. I want to show her pictures of my grandchildren (and see pictures of hers), and gripe about aching bones and aging men. I hope those men are still “silly boys” to us, and that we still feel as young at heart as we did when we met in college.

I know that if it doesn’t, it will be (mostly) my fault.

I know that I need to make the time. Get on the phone. Make the visits.

But I hope she knows that even when I’m all too silent, I’m thinking of her. That she’s got a permanent place in my heart (as do all my other soul sisters).

And she always will.


That’s just the way it is.

 

10 Comments on Sisters of the Heart.

  1. Christina
    March 27, 2012 at 10:57 pm (4 years ago)

    I love you, Amber! more than words :)

    Reply
  2. Gianan
    March 28, 2012 at 12:04 am (4 years ago)

    I call those friends sisterfriends.
    Because they are exactly that. Those friends who would do anything and know everything and don’t care about nothing about the former.

    Reply
    • Amber
      April 1, 2012 at 10:03 pm (4 years ago)

      You are exactly right! We’re all blessed to have a few of those!

      Reply
  3. Meagan
    March 28, 2012 at 1:47 pm (4 years ago)

    I have a couple of sister friends who knew me when, but I find myself making new ones too. It’s wonderful to find those people who really “get” us.

    My grandmother had a circle of friends, some dating to Kindergarten, that she still met with for a monthly lunch up until she died. They came to her funeral and had great stories. It was really neat seeing some of these ladies, whom I had met or at least seen pictures of over the years, and seeing their friendship. She was 80 when she died.

    Reply
  4. Linda M.
    March 28, 2012 at 6:40 pm (4 years ago)

    I also love you Amber. Don’t beat yourself up, because it goes both ways. We all let life get in the way of our friendships. We’ve been friends for so long, that I don’t remember actually meeting you. But you are often in my thoughts and prayers. I miss seeing your bright, smiling face, our long emails back and forth, or just having you drop by because you were in the neighborhood. You truly are a sister of my heart and always will be. You were there numerous times when I needed you, and yet I can’t remember a time that you reached out to me for support, but I hope you know you can – anytime.

    Reply
    • Amber
      April 1, 2012 at 10:02 pm (4 years ago)

      Of course! I do know that. And I think of you often too. I do think an email will be coming your way very soon!

      Reply
  5. Erica
    March 28, 2012 at 8:35 pm (4 years ago)

    I know this feeling all too well. Two kids, a career, two businesses, and now moving….it’s hard to be a great friend. But the good friends will understand.

    Reply
    • Amber
      April 1, 2012 at 9:59 pm (4 years ago)

      They do indeed. And life will eventually calm down, right?

      Reply
  6. Charlotte
    March 29, 2012 at 1:34 pm (4 years ago)

    Aww, I love this. And how very true it is. I actually took off of week next week to reconnect again. Because I miss my cherished friends too much and because I want to see their kids in person, not via photos on FB.

    And we all need friends like the one you mentioned in this post in our lives. I believe she knows how good of a friend you are and I bet she cherishes your friendship just the same :)

    Reply
    • Amber
      April 1, 2012 at 9:55 pm (4 years ago)

      She does, indeed. Have fun on your vacation!

      Reply

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