I Saw Mommy Flashing Santa Claus…

We’ve been working hard to indoctrinate Tori into the Santa culture this year. We have Santa books,  Santa ornaments,  Santa figurines, Santa towels…basically, everywhere she looks, there’s Santa.

And we’ve been quite successful.

When she comes downstairs in the morning, the first thing she does is hug the 36-inch Santa who guards our Christmas tree. Then she goes around the house, gleefully calling “Santa” (well, actually, it’s more like “dan-na,” but we know what she means) whenever she spots one.

She only wants to read Santa books (she even begs to read the Hallmark catalog).

And rather than calling strange men daddy (embarrassing, to say the least), she queries “Santa?” And always seems disappointed when we say no.

So of course we had to take her to see the “real” Santa.

The outing started out promisingly. All day long, I asked her, “do you want to go see Santa?” To which she gleefully replied, “Yeah, Santa!”

Knowing a Santa visit was the reason, she let me dress her in her Christmas finery with a minimum of complaint. She even wore her tights without crying, “off? OFF!” every five seconds.

Once we got to the mall, she was dazzled by all the Christmas decorations. Enchanted by the hundreds of strings of lights hanging from the ceiling. And unduly excited by all the people she saw passing to and fro. In fact, I spent a fair amount of time chasing her as she rushed around, trying to take in everything all at once.

Finally, we arrived at Santa’s abode. The moment she caught sight of him, she was enthralled. Her eyes grew big so big, they were in danger of eating her face.

“Santa, Santa, Santa!” she said, pointing at him while periodically trying to dart between the legs of the families in front of us.

But when her turn came and I picked her up to sit her on his lap, she turned into a wild animal.

“Noooo,” she yelled in my ear, clinging to me with all her strength. As I lowered her toward Santa, she hung on to my shirt with a death grip. He reached for her, trying to pry her from me, but she wouldn’t let go.

She pulled and she pulled and she pulled…until Santa got an eyeful of mommy’s cleavage.

That’s right. Thanks to my daughter, I flashed Santa Claus. But at least I was wearing an appropriately festive red lace bra.

We took the picture anyway, both of us crouching at Santa’s feet (no way was I going to sit on his lap after that introduction).

TORI: Don't you leave me alone with this man. ME: Please don't flash the photographer.

So that’s how our first visit to Santa went. How about you, dear readers? Anybody have any nightmares and/or incredible tales of success to relate?

20 Comments on I Saw Mommy Flashing Santa Claus…

  1. erica
    December 20, 2010 at 3:34 pm (5 years ago)

    I was just about to write on my blog about how well our Santa visit went! Of course, I didn’t go all cleavage on him…

    You know the nominations for the Mommy of the Year Award are over, right?

    Reply
    • Amber
      December 20, 2010 at 4:22 pm (5 years ago)

      Well, it’s never too early to start practicing for next year…

      Reply
  2. Rebecca
    December 20, 2010 at 3:38 pm (5 years ago)

    I bet he was excited to see something exciting…though he looks less than thrilled….What a scrooge! My kids have been uneventful. Always sits on his lap and talks to him. We don’t have any photos because we aren’t willing to pay…..oh well

    Reply
    • Amber
      December 20, 2010 at 4:22 pm (5 years ago)

      Fortunately, this was only like $5. Five dollars I will pay. Especially when it enhances a blog post.

      Reply
  3. Meagan
    December 20, 2010 at 3:59 pm (5 years ago)

    There is a certain age where as excited as they are by the idea, he’s still a scary strange man. He’s also a log bigger than she might have expected.

    We’ve always had good luck with pictures at FSM (Lisa Walker does a great job) and Chris always takes a few with our camera. We have scoring where one or the other of the boys is giving him a suspicious look.

    Reply
    • Amber
      December 20, 2010 at 4:23 pm (5 years ago)

      I was really impressed by the lighting and everything. She did as good a job as can be expected, I think. I’m thinking (hoping) next year will be more successful. But hey, at least she’s not screaming!

      Reply
  4. Katy
    December 20, 2010 at 4:41 pm (5 years ago)

    My daughter didnt like santa this year either. SO I walked away not spending the 21.99 for the picture, because I didnt even get a pic, she was latched onto me tightly.
    Merry Christmas!
    xo
    Katy

    Reply
    • Amber
      December 21, 2010 at 8:50 am (5 years ago)

      And Merry Christmas to you! Sounds like it was for the best anyway. An extra present for her (or you) instead?

      Reply
  5. Janet
    December 20, 2010 at 8:01 pm (5 years ago)

    $21.99???? I seriously had no idea it costs big bucks to get a picture with Santa. Guess it’s clear that I do not have children. lol

    Reply
    • Amber
      December 21, 2010 at 8:49 am (5 years ago)

      Yeah, some places are crazy expensive. I’m not willing to lay down those kind of bucks.

      Reply
  6. Megan (Best of Fates)
    December 20, 2010 at 9:49 pm (5 years ago)

    What wouldn’t you do to avoid a stocking full of coal?

    ‘Cause I’m assuming nothing.

    Reply
    • Amber
      December 21, 2010 at 8:48 am (5 years ago)

      Let’s keep that our little secret, shall we?

      Reply
  7. AmyBlam
    December 20, 2010 at 9:54 pm (5 years ago)

    There are SEVERAL photos of me red faced and crying while I sit on my mom who is sitting on Santa.

    Reply
    • Amber
      December 21, 2010 at 8:48 am (5 years ago)

      Ahhh, it’s an American tradition, isn’t it? Scare our children by forcing them to make friends with a giant, bearded stranger.

      Reply
  8. liz
    December 20, 2010 at 10:01 pm (5 years ago)

    I always felt bad for Santas because half of their clientele leaves unhappy and hysterical, but maybe they have little “highlights” to their job like this!

    Reply
    • Amber
      December 21, 2010 at 8:47 am (5 years ago)

      Well, from the expression on his face in the picture, it didn’t make him too happy. I think he was the Scrooge in disguise.

      Reply
  9. Jen
    December 20, 2010 at 10:15 pm (5 years ago)

    Oh my, you all (Santa included) look thrilled to me in that picture. 😉

    Reply
    • Amber
      December 21, 2010 at 8:46 am (5 years ago)

      Yes, it was fabulous. One of my finer moments as a mother.

      Reply
  10. SaucyB
    December 21, 2010 at 12:56 pm (5 years ago)

    Oh Amber that’s too funny. I suppose you could chalk it up to giving Santa an early Xmas present? Lol Tori looks just so adorable with her pigtails and those cheeks! Have a very Merry Christmas. It’s so great to experience the holiday thru a child’s eyes when they’re that age. :)

    Reply

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