My Daughter, the Human Chew Toy.

I will be the first to admit that my daughter is  pretty scrumptious looking kid. I myself have nommed on her more than once.

Cheeks meant for nomming on

Tell me you don't want to nibble those cheeks.

But I’m allowed. After all, as her mom, I made those juicy looking thighs.

Unfortunately, her deliciousness has caught the attention of one of the little boys in her class. I’m not sure which one, since her teachers (smartly) won’t tell me, so let’s just call him Jaws.

Jaws struck for the first time early Tuesday afternoon. Apparently, they were tussling over a toy, and he decided that the only way to win the battle was to use his teeth. In fact, he chomped so hard that he actually drew blood.

And that’s when the trouble began.

I’m guessing Tori actually is made of sugar and spice, because he found her so delicious that he returned for seconds later that afternoon.

That’s right. He bit her twice on the same day—leaving her with matching teeth marks on both arms. But I didn’t get upset. I mean kids bite, right? That’s just the way it is.

Wednesday passed without incident. Then, on Thursday, he struck again. Just like his namesake, he lurked in the shadows until the moment was right, going for the kill  when her back was turned.

And, I’ll admit, I started to get pissed. Once, okay. Twice, well, what can you do. But three bites? In three days? That’s. Not. Cool.  But still, I kept my temper, telling myself that they were doing the best they could to defuse the situation.

Friday morning, Tori didn’t want to go to school. When I tried to leave, she clamped her legs around my waist and got a death grip on my hair. Her teacher literally had to peel her off of me. I left with the image of her screaming inconsolably in someone else’s arms burning across my brain.

But still, I remained optimistic. Surely nothing would go wrong that day. After all, everyone was on red alert. I continued on with my day relatively free of worry.

Then I got the call.

Jaws had come back for the kill—and his attack had left her bleeding. Again.

People, I saw red. Literally. My inner lioness roared to life, and I found myself wanting to inflict serious damage on that little boy (that lioness, she’s not very reasonable).

Instead, I called the doctor to make sure she didn’t need a rabies shot. And when my vision returned to normal? I bolted out of the office to see for myself what the hell was going on.

Unfortunately, her teacher is a very nice person. And I? Am not good with conflict. So instead of biting her face off, I (somewhat) calmly asked what happened.

Turns out, Jaws doesn’t bite anyone except for Tori. And he’s not only sneaky, he’s lightning fast. When he attacks, he darts across the room before anyone can stop him.

She told me it wouldn’t happen again. That one of the two teachers in Tori’s room is now acting as his handler, keeping him separated from Tori at all times.

But at this point, I have very little faith. I informed her that if and when he does it again, I want serious action taken. I told her I thought it would be a good idea to put one of them in a different room.

She said, “we’ll see.”

So I’m spending my weekend stewing. Wondering if I should purchase a muzzle for this kid. Hoping his mom is feeling as awful as I am.

I don’t know what to do (short of covering her in Tabasco sauce).  So I’m turning to you, dear readers. Anybody have any ideas for me?

25 Comments on My Daughter, the Human Chew Toy.

  1. Las Vegas Mama
    October 16, 2010 at 9:27 pm (5 years ago)

    I wonder WHY he is biting her. It sounds like he is really hunting her! Could he be angry for some reason?

    Well, anyway, if it were me I would keep her home until I could get a better guarantee than “we’ll see”!!! Not good enough, dude. “we’ll see” doesn’t cut it when the teacher has already seen plenty – he keeps drawing blood! And poor little Tori! She is the one suffering here. Your inner lioness it RIGHT to want to protect her at all costs. So do it. Let your inner lioness out. No one is going to judge you for that, for protecting your little defenseless child. If you do not protect her, who will?? Certainly not her teachers!!! And maybe Tori deserves a little break from school until you can get a better guarantee of her safety.

    PS- yeah, she is ADORABLE!

    Reply
    • Amber
      October 18, 2010 at 11:01 am (5 years ago)

      I’m out of vacation time, so I can’t pull her out, but I am prepared to ROAR if anything else happens! You can count on it!

      Reply
  2. Charlotte
    October 16, 2010 at 10:52 pm (5 years ago)

    Awwww, she really is the cutest… And those CHEEKS! What a beautiful girl.

    Oy. I don’t know what to tell you about how to handle this situation with Jaws. I also am curious as to why he’s singling her out in the class? I guess it doesn’t matter much, but I really would have to hold the teacher accountable and the school for not keeping them separated. This shouldn’t happen. Once was enough; four times is completely unacceptable.

    Reply
    • Amber
      October 18, 2010 at 11:01 am (5 years ago)

      I know, I’d like to know too. I think they were just underestimating how fast he is – I’m pretty sure they’re taking it seriously now. (I hope).

      Reply
  3. SaucyB
    October 17, 2010 at 9:24 am (5 years ago)

    Hey,
    I’ve been on the other side of the this, my kid was the biter and you know what? I still say that school IS NOT DOING ENOUGH to protect your daughter. When my kid was the offender I was mortified and felt terrible. I did all the things and reinforcement at home to try to get him to stop biting, but unfortunately, for the most part, it was a matter of him outgrowing it. I honestly was concerned he was going to be kicked out of the daycare, but if it was necessary, I understood. I couldn’t blame them.
    Now, back to to Tori. Stuff like this does happen when the kids are at the age. I’ll let the school slide on two incidences. But NOT four. You have every right to DEMAND that the kid be moved to another room. Especially because he seems to keep specifically going after Tori.
    Squeaky wheel gets the grease. Be the squeaky wheel. good luck!

    Reply
    • Amber
      October 18, 2010 at 11:00 am (5 years ago)

      You know what? Writing this post has made me feel a lot better about my instincts. I’m glad to see y’all don’t think I’m overreacting. We’ll see what this week brings – but I am looking at my options.

      Reply
  4. Kelly
    October 17, 2010 at 3:47 pm (5 years ago)

    I would threaten to pull Tori from the school if she is bitten one more time. I’d feel differently if Jaws was biting everyone, but singling Tori out makes me think they could easily protect her by a) watching Jaws and b) keeping him away from her. Seems easy to me.

    I agree – be the squeaky wheel!

    Reply
    • Amber
      October 18, 2010 at 10:58 am (5 years ago)

      Squeak, squeak, squeak. Don’t worry, I’m not afraid to outright screech!

      Reply
  5. Rebecca
    October 17, 2010 at 4:45 pm (5 years ago)

    My son has bit my daughter about five times in the past couple of years. When *HE* bites my daughter, it’s because my daughter is being a true nuisance. She torments him and he pleads with her by saying “No No No!” and if I’m in the shower or doing something that has my full attention and can’t come right away when I hear his cries for help he takes a bite out of her. He’s been in pre-school for several months now and so far *knock on wood* he hasn’t bit any kids in class. When he does, I’ll be mortified and I hope the teacher will tell me who he bites so I can at least call the mom and apologize. (Do you think it would help or would the mom just come after me or my child??)

    Would it be wrong to tell your daughter to bite Jaws back? I’ve heard that once bitten the biter normally does not bite back.

    Reply
    • Amber
      October 18, 2010 at 10:58 am (5 years ago)

      I’d like to talk to his mom, just so I can pick her brain about what’s going on. And an apology would be nice! At this point, I would tell her to bite back, but I don’t think she’d understand me…or remember, when in the situation.

      Reply
  6. Tiffany@Lattes&Life
    October 17, 2010 at 11:06 pm (5 years ago)

    Oh, girl. I don’t have any advice but man I feel for ya. I would for sure have a serious talk with the staff. Can you speak to someone higher than her teacher? Have they informed Jaws’ mama about this? Poor little girl!!! (And poor you!!)

    Reply
    • Amber
      October 18, 2010 at 10:57 am (5 years ago)

      Yes, I think they have told his mom. But if he’s only doing it at school, what can she do? Hopefully, it was a one-week stage that he’s already grown out of!

      Reply
  7. Amber
    October 18, 2010 at 12:10 am (5 years ago)

    I’d be tempted to ask Jaws’s mother what Jaws’s problem is and say that if he bit your kid one more time that you’d take Jaws by the ankles and swing him over your head.

    Reply
    • Amber
      October 18, 2010 at 10:56 am (5 years ago)

      Yeah, that’s definitely what I’d like to do. Although I have a friend who has a biter, so I can see the other side too…it’s not fun for any of us. Sucks, sucks, sucks!

      Reply
  8. Stacey
    October 18, 2010 at 9:06 am (5 years ago)

    We’ll see? What they would be seeing from me is my backside as I pulled my child out of there and never returned. I’d be mighty tempted to call either the police or child protective services too. One bite? OK. Things happen. Two? I still probably wouldn’t react too strongly, but what has happened to your daughter is unacceptable. You were certainly within your rights to ask that the other child be moved to a different room. Hell, they should have done it without you asking!

    I pulled my son out of a daycare once because when I went to pick him up he was trying to go down the indoor slide and there was another kid jumping up and down on his back. My son was screaming and the teacher was completely ignoring him. There were 3 kids (including my son) left at the daycare and she couldn’t be bothered to notice that my child was screaming bloody murder. They got an ear full, I got a refund and he never returned.

    Reply
    • Amber
      October 18, 2010 at 10:54 am (5 years ago)

      I’m going to give them another chance…it’s actually a really good daycare, and she’s been happy there (until this). And good daycares? Are hard to find around here. But if it doesn’t stop, I definitely will pull her.

      Reply
      • Stacey
        October 18, 2010 at 11:27 am (5 years ago)

        I realize that sometimes I may come on a bit strong, and yes, good daycares are hard to find. I just can’t comprehend why they wouldn’t have already moved him to another room after the 3rd or 4th bite and gave you a “we’ll see” answer when you asked about it. I think I’d be camped out and observing to find out who that child is for myself. Then his mother and I would have a nice long chat.

        Reply
  9. Theta Mom
    October 18, 2010 at 12:42 pm (5 years ago)

    You are NOT over-reacting and in my opinion, they are NOT doing enough. My 18 month-old was the victim of a biter in his day-care classroom and I was mad as hell – It broke the skin, went through his clothing and he needed to be seen by the pediatrician. I demanded a meeting immediately the next am with the owner of the day-care as well as two of his teachers – they ended up adding in a 3rd teacher to “shadow” the biting child and it helped. YOU are the only advocate for your child and if you’re not satisified with what is going on – speak up – you are the only voice your child has right now mama!

    Reply
    • Amber
      October 18, 2010 at 1:41 pm (5 years ago)

      Thanks for the support! I think they might be adding a teacher to the classroom, so hopefully that will help. We’re 2/3 of the way through the day and I haven’t had a phone call yet. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

      Reply
  10. Jill
    October 18, 2010 at 1:00 pm (5 years ago)

    Kids bite. It happens. All it takes is a second for it to happen. Kids grow out of it and pretty much all kids will either bite or get bitten. You should be concerned, but if this is the only instance of trouble your daughter is facing, it sounds like she is doing pretty good.

    Call child protective services??? Really? They have much better and more important things to do. This doesn’t sound like a case of fight club or bite club for kids.

    Things will work out and you daughter and this kid will probably end up being friends.

    Reply
    • Stacey
      October 18, 2010 at 4:16 pm (5 years ago)

      The only reason I suggested child protective services is because it sounds like they’re not doing all they could to prevent this child from continuing to bite her child. I get that some kids bite. But this situation has already gone beyond that. We’re talking about 4 times already, and their response to her request to move him into a different room was “We’ll see?” That gets a Really??? from me. That is unacceptable. If they won’t take responsibility for the kids in their care, someone should. I’m not one to rush to call the authorities if it can be handled in house, but it doesn’t sound like they’re doing all they could do.

      Reply
      • Amber
        October 18, 2010 at 4:38 pm (5 years ago)

        Don’t worry, Stacey. That last comment from Jill was actually my husband trying to stir up trouble. He thinks he’s cute when he does that. I absolutely know what you mean.

        Reply
      • Jill
        October 18, 2010 at 4:53 pm (5 years ago)

        When you have a structured classroom environment such as daycare where kids have formed bonds with their teachers, it’s unwise to just change things up. To you they are just hired help, but to the kids, they are mommy’s away from mommy. If you change things up on the kid that is biting then that is going to put even more stress on the kid which might just make him bite even more.

        The kids don’t know why they are being moved. He’s not going to get the correlation between biting and being moved into a different room, and you don’t need to make him an outcast. Kids are smarter that adults give them credit for and it might take some time with books and playtime devoted to no biting, but they will work through it. He needs to be talked to calmly about why biting is bad, and you don’t bite your friends. This is where Yo Gabba Gabba did a good job with that song.

        I doubt the kid is doing this to be viscous and targeting his victims. We are talking about toddlers here. He probably couldn’t express himself the way he wants and this gets results.

        Reply
  11. Unknown Mami
    October 18, 2010 at 3:24 pm (5 years ago)

    I’m so sorry she has turned into that kids chew toy du jour. I’m sure it will stop because it has too. If it happens again I guess you have to bite the teacher.

    Reply
    • Amber
      October 18, 2010 at 4:38 pm (5 years ago)

      Oooh, bite the teacher. I hadn’t thought of that one.

      Reply

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